16 Tips on How to Be Beautiful (part 1).

written by Silas & Grace.

People always tell us that the key to looking beautiful or being attractive is to have perfect makeup, hair, and outfits. But doesn’t that go without saying?
I mean, we already know that the right hairstyle, makeup, and outfit is going to make us look better, but are there other lesser-known ways to be beautiful? I feel that being attractive goes so far beyond just those three things. There are so many other factors to look at when thinking of how to be beautiful.
I’ve found that there are habits you can cultivate that will help you be seen as more attractive to other people—which is the whole point anyway, right?

These beauty tips will show you how to be beautiful and reveal why they make you beautiful when you follow them.
1. Posture.
One of the interesting things I’ve noticed with having good posture is that as soon as you straighten your back when sitting, most other people around you will automatically do it too.
I’m not sure why that is: maybe they want to emulate a good habit or they feel strange being slumped over while you’re sitting more elegantly?
But having good posture is one of the key things you can do when learning how to be beautiful, and a 2009 study from Ohio State University even found that it can give you more confidence in your own thoughts.
Moreover, another posture-related way to be more beautiful is to unfold your arms.
Vanessa Van Edwards, over at Science of People, posits that one way to increase attractiveness is to look open and available. Among the other ways she highlights, she lists uncrossing your arms (and your legs too when sitting down) as a way to look more open, and hence more attractive.
Good posture makes you look more graceful and feel more confident. It’s definitely worth training yourself to get into the habit of having good posture! You’ll stand out in the crowd, but only in a good way.

2. Genuinely Smile.
Want to know how to be beautiful naturally without even using makeup? This is how.
A 2013 study of psychologists found that “the evaluation of attractiveness is strongly influenced by the intensity of a smile expressed on a face”. And it even went on to conclude that “a happy facial expression could even compensate for relative unattractiveness.”
From my own experience, I’ve also found that a smile can be really inviting and remove any intimidation. Meeting new people can often be draining and sometimes even scary, so a genuine smile can really put other people at ease!
My tip? Practice doing a genuine-looking smile in the mirror that looks happy, sincere and not awkward or creepy. You’ll be amazed at how much more people will perceive you as beautiful—even if sub-consciously.

3. Less Talking.
There always seems to be those people in a group or at a party that talk…a lot. And it can go either one of two ways. One; they’re funny and outgoing, the life of the party. Or, two; they say a whole lot of nothing and it’s exhausting just to hear them go on and on.
One of the lesser-known tips to look beautiful is to say less but say a lot.
What I mean is, when you speak, have something to say. Give people food for thought and show yourself as wise. And you know what, that’s actually what the Bible says too!
“Even a fool who keeps silent is considered wise; when he closes his lips, he is deemed intelligent.” (Proverbs 17:28)
Whether you believe the Bible contains the words of God or not, there’s no denying that this ancient piece of wisdom is interesting and worth considering! Because appearing wise, knowledgeable and smart—or even just kind and funny with your words—makes you really really attractive.
Gil Greengross, anthropologist writing for Psychology Today says, “The effect of a great sense of humor on women’s attractions might be partially explained by the fact that funny people are considered to be more social and more intelligent, things that women seek in a mate.”
And I think this works vice versa too! Using your words well makes you look competent, and that just screams beauty.

4. Less Complaining.
Now while we’re still on the subject of talking, let’s talk about complaining because this is one of the “do not’s” when learning how to be beautiful.
Feeling frustrated about something or someone and wanting to talk about it is fine (as long as you don’t spread gossip or say something with the intention of ruining someone’s reputation). It can be very healthy to talk it over with people in a way that can help lead to practical solutions.
But don’t be that person who always finds something to complain about. You’ll be seen as a negative and/or ungrateful person. And this just ends up translating into annoying people or looking bitter. And looking bitter isn’t attractive.
Instead, learn to let go (you can’t win every battle), find ways to lift others up, lift your situation up, or find the positive things in life to talk about even when you’re stressed.
It’ll not only make you feel better, but people will naturally want to be around you. They’ll gravitate towards you because they can count on you to be uplifting. And being uplifting is one of the best things you can do when learning how to be beautiful.

5. Be Quietly Confident.
Cultivate a sense of self-worth like you would a garden. Prune and look after it carefully each and every day.
Have you ever had the opportunity to show a loved one something you were proud of? Maybe it was a beautiful craft, drawing, song, or accomplishment that you just knew they’d appreciate.
You didn’t have to convince them of its worth or worry about justifying it to them. You just knew it was valuable and that they’d appreciate it.
Well, without being too cliché, that’s YOU in a nutshell.
You don’t need to prove yourself or show off (showing off is really unattractive anyway).
You can just be quietly confident that you are worth something—because you are. And having this sense of self-worth and respect is actually SO attractive. Why? Because it subconsciously communicates to others that you are valuable.
A 2009 study from the International Journal of Cosmetic Science found that a group of women judged men in video clips as being more attractive from the confidence boost they gained by wearing aerosol spray, compared to a group of men with the same average attractiveness who did not wear any aerosol in the video clips.
So, be confident! And, even if you don’t feel confident, fake it until you make it! Harvard professor Amy Cuddy found in a study that even striking a confident pose can make you feel more successful.
In short, there are always things about yourself that are uniquely beautiful (even if you can’t see it yourself yet). Sometimes it can help to ask a loved one what they like about your appearance so you can start cultivating your sense of self-worth and recognize what is beautiful about you.

6. Stay in a Group of Friends.
Did you know that a 2013 study carried out by the University of California found that people tend to look more attractive in groups?
James Hamblin, the editor of the health channel over at The Atlantic explains this effect—which has sometimes been called “the Cheerleader Effect”—as having to do with our brains taking a snapshot of all the differently shaped faces in a group and “averaging them out”, thus making each face look more beautiful and proportioned.
The study also revealed that just a small group of people creates this effect, meaning you don’t even need to be that popular!
So want to know how to be more beautiful? Hang out with people you love.

7. Pay Attention and Mimic.
One of the more surprising ways to be beautiful, a study has shown (and it has been found in other studies too) that discreetly mimicking a person’s body language can make you appear more beautiful.
Not only that, but I reckon it also gives off the impression that you’re a good listener and are attentive to them.
So next time you’re in a conversation, try mimicking the body language of the person you’re talking to. Just don’t be too obvious about it, because that’d be kinda annoying!

8. Dress Modestly in a Way That Compliments Your Style.
Alright, so we’ve talked about what you can do psychologically to be attractive. But what about your actual appearance?
There’s no doubt about it, learning how to flatter yourself with the best hairstyle, makeup, and outfit is an essential tip for those wondering how to be more beautiful. It’s a skill you have to learn and master (search all our beauty hacks here).
But there’s a whole lot more to it than just makeup, hair, and clothes—there are attitudes and philosophies that come with it too.
Since you’ll have cultivated a sense of self-worth and be quietly confident (see tip #5), you’ll gradually begin to feel inclined to dress in a subtle way that is a positive overflow of your own sense of self-worth and which naturally communicates it to others.
And the good news is that subtlety is confident, classy, beautiful and timeless…which is why you can never go wrong with it!
Research has even found a correlation between focusing on your own body a lot and negative body image (e.g. Fredrickson and Roberts, 1997), and, when modesty is seen as a way to respect the body, a study found that “modesty emerged as a guard to protect women from some negative thinking.”
So why does subtlety work so well? In summary, it works because, first of all, it is timeless and looks great, and secondly, because it can actually help you stop focusing on your body excessively, and thirdly, because if you use it as an expression of self-respect, it can actually help protect you from negative thoughts about your body.
What does that look like for me? Well, you likely know yourself better than most, and so whatever you’ve come to appreciate about your appearance in particular, subtlely highlight that in how you dress. E.g. if you like your hair, wear it in a way that makes it more of a feature in your look but don’t go overboard with it.
And if you’re the sort of person reading this who feels they have nothing special that they like about themselves, then you seriously need to read tip #5 again!
You are enough. So use what you have—and remember, subtlety is king. (Or should I say, “Queen”!)

to be continued